The power of "no"

“I invest my time and my energies where I choose.  My time and my energies are gifts which I guard and give by my choice – but never by the demands, dictates, or the expectations of others.

I allow no one to ‘sell’ me on anything that I do not genuinely choose to accept.  I live my entire life by my own decisions – never by the pressures or the selling skills of others.” ~Shad Helmstetter

This past weekend, my wife and I were presented with the opportunity to purchase some real estate.  We both have considered making such a purchase, because we can definitely see how it would benefit our family, given our lifestyle and preferences, so we had no problem seeing what offer we would be presented.

When the time came to sit down and crunch the numbers, we realized that it was not the right time or place to make the purchase, and we politely communicated that message to the salesperson.

Predictably, he started to ramble off the benefits and attempted to tug at our heartstrings, trying desperately to get us to reconsider the value of making such a purchase.  After his final pitch, I said to him, “I can definitely see the benefits of what you are offering us.  At this point in time, I am not comfortable making a commitment; nothing you can say will convince me to change my mind.”

You could just see, as he realized no commission was coming his way from us, that he lost his cool.  His face started turning red and he started sweating profusely as he continually wiped his face.  His last (and costly) statement to us was, “Well, don’t you care about your family?”  At that point, we had enough, and we walked away from the table.  While it was an unpleasant experience, which we were sure to share with his supervisor, we were able to quickly emotionally disconnect from the experience and enjoy the rest of our day, simply chalking it up to amateur and desperate behavior on the part of the salesperson.

In any sales pitch or presentation, the more desperate party always “loses.”  While I try not to operate on a win versus lose basis, it sure rang true that day.  The salesperson lost more than a commission.  He lost control of his emotions, and he lost our respect.

You have the authority to say no at any time.

When you are given the choice to say yes or no, don’t let yourself feel uncomfortable saying no.  Even if you know the other party really wants you to say yes, you have the authority over yourself to say no, regardless of how desperately the other party wants to hear otherwise.  After all, when all is said and done, you have to live with your decision and all responsibility that comes with it.

The power to choose is simply powerful!

-Victor